For safety and the pure enjoyment of God, we are so wise to learn to walk with God instead of begging Him to walk with us. Walking with God in pursuit of daily obedience is the sure means of fulfilling each of His wonderful plans.
- Beth Moore, Breaking Free, p. 187
In looking for my daily mentoring moment, this is what God led me too. If anything, God wants me to learn how to embrace walking with Him in a new way. This seems fitting on the first day of new year. My heart's desire is to jump in God's boat and see where He takes me. To do this, I believe I must overcome my biggest struggle, my deep hidden insecurities. But how? His Word today tells me this:
Trust in the Lord and do what is good; dwell in the land and live securely. Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your heart's desires. Commit you way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act, making your righteousness shine like the dawn, your justice like the noonday.
- Ps 37:3-6
Thus far in my life, I believe I hear God. I believe I follow God. As a missionary and someone called to serve God full time I believe I could honestly say I am even obedient to God most of the time. My insecurities though, which run deep and wide in my soul, seem to interfere on some level with me walking in the pure enjoyment that Beth talks about here. The cool thing is that at times, God works in my life supernaturally and helps me overcome them. On my own, I am a shy, introverted, reflective individual. At other times, I'm able to overcome myself and be extroverted, poignant, and even boisterous. Here's one example from my life:
I'm most at peace when I'm teaching. But being up in front of group of people sharing my thoughts just seems insane. I worry about my looks, my verbage, and everything in between. I fight the urge to run screaming in the other direction. I can hardly believe what I have to say is relevant to anyone. Yet, somehow, when I push onward toward obedience in teaching the Word God has given me and as I ignore these fleeting thoughts God works in my life in a way that is hardly captured in words. As I teach on what God wills, a peace like nothing I have ever felt sweeps over my entire body. My obedience brings joy, peace and complete contentment. But anyway, I'm rabbit trailing....
Back to the point at hand: What is my elected mentor teaching me today? Well, though I risk taking this quote out of context - I feel God motivating me through this quote to live without fear, which makes since because He so repetitively tells us "Don't be afraid" in His Word. I discern that if I can somehow tap into living free with Him, I can experience the peace and joy I feel in the moments I am teaching... all of the time. I fully recognize today that there is more to walking obedient alongside God. I'm not just to walk with God, I'm to walk with God and love every single minute with joy and elation no matter what!
To deal more literally with the quote, I see God reminding me that it's not about me asking God to come and join me in the work I am doing, but rather it is about me waking up, putting my shoes on, running out the door and following my faithful friend on the path He has mapped out for me. As I do, I will surely accomplish His will for my life.
As I tried to embrace this thought today, it looked different than you might expect. I was left running around in East Texas looking like I had a firecracker in my pants. But, the joys I felt came as I cooked a meal for my huge family. I did what God wanted me to0 today and I was blessed to see around 20 people pray and thank God for a wonderful year. This is a rare occurrence in families today, but experiencing the warmth over food, fun and conversation offered my heart a glimpse of heaven. So today, I was able to follow God's path for me. Tomorrow, I hope to do it better. It will take a while to get these legs in to running shape, but in time God will get me there.
Happy New Year!
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