My calling is on my mind today. God is reminding me that if I am to fulfill my calling, I am to be disciplined in the tasks He has set before me. Today, I made gains toward that goal. Right now, finishing my thesis, course work for my other degree, and simple missionary duties are at the forefront of my brain EVERYDAY. I know that I am in training right now because I have a cosmic size desire to learn as much as I can about God and who I am in Him. Right now, I can't get enough exposure to God's Words and I am going to extreme lengths to be teachable and learn from as many people as I can.
Anyway, I know a little about my mentor's calling because I have researched it for my thesis. She talks about her calling in the Breaking Free series, especially in the video "The Display of His Splendor." Her calling first came to her as she was working as a counselor to sixth-grade girls. In an interview she noted, "Early one morning, as the girls were sleeping, I sensed God's presence enfold me. There were no audible words, no bright lights. But suddenly I knew, without a doubt, my future was entirely His." Her story is pretty interesting from this point out, but rabbit trailing there does not serve my purpose's today.
As God has reminded me of Beth's initial calling today, He reminds me of His pure intentions and desires for my life. I, too, was called early in life. My senior year of high school, God clearly revealed that I would serve Him with my vocational abilities. I didn't really get it at the time, I only knew that I should do what I could to learn how to be a better communicator. By this point, I was all ready OK with just going and doing whatever God had me to do - so it didn't really matter to me what I did - just that God was saying go and learn and get ready.
Well, college proved to be a challenge initially for me. I would say, I did keep learning - I pursued a communication degree. I remained in church and in love with God. But, I was at a secular college and the worldviews I was exposed to for a time tainted the purity of my calling. Relationships also impeded my pure view of it for a while. Though God was with me the whole time, teaching me, maturing me - I did not make very much gain on my calling for about three years.
Eventually, I transferred to a new school. This was the best decision I made for it put my heart and mind back in alignment to God's will. God has enabled me to make up for lost time and in the last six years I think He has educated me about my calling exponentially. He has also given me back the hunger I had for Him in my youth and increased that with an adult passion that has an unquenchable thirst for Him.
What's the point of all this? Well, today God is encouraging me. For awhile my mentor ebbed and flowed with her calling because God needed to work in her heart and help her "break free" from a few things. But now, she is living free and doing her best to serve God completely. Through this reminder God is reminding me not to get caught up in the times I have ebbed and flowed but to trust that He will use me despite the times I may not have glorified Him completely with my life choices. Oswald Chambers says more eloquently what my heart is thinking right now:
I am ridiculously in love with God, so at least I know I have that going for me :O) But, God is showing me the need to focus on Him. I'm just to be content no matter what He has me to do everyday, even if those things don't make sense to me. God gives me little glimpses of who and what I will do for Him one day - I think just to drive me in the direction I need to go in my education. Let's just say, I don't know how in the world He would ever get me there - I definitely know in my mind it doesn't seem feasible. But what I do know, is I am willing to submit to God. I'm willing to go through whatever training necessary to achieve His will for my life. For now, I rest in knowing that by obedient to Him I will fulfill my calling and that my love for God won't do anything but grow deeper.
To my new friend reading, just know - God desires the same for you :O)
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